As sure as life precedes so should we. Many years have been spent trying to understand the meaning of life and ones purpose in it. On this most will agree. Yet, there comes a time when every question settles comfortably on the pillow of acceptance. I've not seen even the most humble,faithful and God fearing one without a turn on the pain train of life.
When it rains you can best believe that it rains on all.
The same can be said for the sunshine. So what are the options in response to seemingly unbearable incomprehensible circumstances? The one thing that I have always notated is that "Attitude is Everything."
No. We are not robotic creatures programed to quickly compute and output the right response. However our learned reactions can be changed by exercising the power of choice.
There are a few necessary principle muscles that must be flexed in order for this to work and result positively.The first is the
belief muscle- You are what you decide you are. Not what you have been taught to be or what you saw growing up. When in childhood a lot of times we were shown not so good coping skills.
If dad walked out of the house after an argument with mom we saw her bitter. Sometimes yelling and screaming or sending us to our room when we did not deserve to be isolated from the rest of the house. We had done nothing wrong.
If there was a lost income perhaps there was a demonstrated dependency on substance abuse (drinking alcohol) in order to numb the pain of all the concerns that losing ones job might generate.
The better response for both misfortunes would have been, for the parents to adopt a positive mindset and say to the family "We will get through this" and begin the footwork to do so.
Most of us would have been better programmed emotionally if when parents disagreed they talked about it without anger and committed to finding a solution that benefits the entire family. It would have enabled the children to see two adults working together maturely and healthy therefore, reinforcing the children's security and safety in the home.
The second muscle that must be flexed is the
willingness muscle-One must want and be willing to do and be better than the things that they find distasteful about the past. Now of course there are tendons and ligaments that help muscles to perform at their best. The willingness muscle releases it's highest optimization when coupled with honesty and determination. A great way to start is to do some soul searching.
This brings us to the third and most important muscle the
courage muscle. The reason that this is the most important of the three is because
belief and willingness stand on the shoulder of courage. Only bravery can stimulate the belief that one can make a change and only courage can walk one through the door of willingness and determination.
One can believe something is right but never do what is right. One can be willing and determined but, never exercise their willingness or determination with a course of action.
Courage exonerates us and produces results.Remember the story of the Wizard of OZ?
Dorothy, Tin man and Lion all wanted something from the Wizard.
Their shared belief,willingness and determination took them on a long journey in which they encountered many obstacles. Eventually they made it to the Wizards place only to find that the Wizard is a phony. This angered the Lion so much that he courageously stood up to the Wizard. His courage earned the desired reward for all of them and their lives were forever changed for the better.
Remember Winners never quit and quitters never win. It helps knowing that it rains on every one and when the sun comes out; it too shines on all. Will you continue to complain and be gloomy on a sunny day because of the rain that fell yesterday or, will you enjoy today's sunshine? It is a choice and only you can courageously decide.
You not your past determines your tomorrow.(C)logicalpoetist November 2010
