What is the meaning of family? Some think that is all the people that you are related to. This is just one very basic meaning. Family can also be those unrelated.
What really makes family is the love, empathy and compassion of those that we have in our lives. I have seen people who were not born unto the same bloodline make a family unit. The beauty in it is that sometimes it's more refreshing and empowering than what we find in relationships with people that we are actually related to.
Often times one may be saddened by the lack of closeness amongst relatives. Why does this happen? Why do families find themselves torn apart and dehydrated of love the way they need it from one another? The answer lacks simplicity.. There are a myriad of answers.
In a perfect world one would all rather be close to those that they are born unto. However, stubborness or unwillingness to forgive rob us. As we go thru life we meet people that seem to be closer to us than our very own.
Perhaps they have provided necessary nourishment that not provided by our own families. When you find a connection with another person in essence a void is filled. The decision to accept this person as a seregate is made easy because it is replacing what is missing.
If you yourself find that life has dealt you a "strange hand" when it comes to relatives, the first thing to do is to look within. Everything starts with you.
Understand that there can be no healing without the act of internal construction. We all have a responsibility to look at how we ourselves are presenting to the people in our world and the world around us.
A good look in te mirror is never a bad idea.
Perception plays a huge role in what we get out of our relationships. Sometimes it is not the other person. Sometimes it is our own interpretation.
Once that honest self-inventory is taken the benefit is, that at the end of self review lies an option to choose.
The choice to accept people and things for who and what they are and not what they appear to be.
One of my favorite prayers is this:
God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the Courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to know the difference.
This prayer just brings it all home. Some things are as they seem... irreprable..
However we MUST go on.. We must continue to live and we must continue to be a good person.
I have seen the result of unresolved issues displayed in a lifestyle of anger-
Anger destroys the person that has not accepted that, they cannot change another. It can even further hurt the other person.
Wisdom may be used to change ones own attitude and response to a situation, however...Staying angry is like having on a winter coat 365 days a year. It is heavy.
The good thing is that yes, you can hang that coat in the closet whenever you are are tired of wearing it.
It sounds easy and it is.. Pain, hurt, anger, jealousy,disappointment are mere items that we pick up and carry around. They weigh us down because we won't put them down.
It really is all up to you to decide not to keep these soul sucking emotions on like a warm winter coat. We all know that having on a coat for all four seasons will make us warm and eventually too hot! So take it off. The same holds true for for the things that hurt us. Take them off!
I challenge you today to show love to someone who seems to dislike you. Say something kind to someone who tries to demean you. Do something nice for someone who mistreats you and be consistant in your actions no matter how they re-act.
They may or may not change but do it anyway.
Remember.. I said that everything starts with you? It also ends with you.
You will be rewarded with freedom from all the negative energy that you used to put into being upset by the challenge. You will begin to feel happier as a person and most of all, others will begin to see that you are unaffected by the negative and INFECTING WITH POSITIVITY. Since making this choice for myself I can view the world, family and all people thru different eyes, the eyes of my chosen attitude. My life has been forever changed. I choose this attitude daily. I choose to be kind, happy, friendly, joyous and the result is that I am free! The overall result is a more enriched and meaningful life...
I wish the same for all of you... It is within your power. Just choose-
Today is an OPPORTUNITY to begin life anew with a changed attitude!
God Bless you,
Najai
(C) copyright logicalpoetist June 2009
