Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Whispers coming from somewhere... "Psssst... Psssst...
Excuse me sister do you have a few dollars that you could spare?" This well dressed beautiful sister that appeared to have it all together on the exterior beckoned me.
My name is Fawn... When I looked at her face. I knew her. Forgetting that she'd asked me for money; I began expressing excitement. I had not seen her for about fifteen years. As I reached out to hug her she reached back and held me so tight as though she was thirsty to feel anothers arms wrapped around her soul. As we embraced she said sis, it is so good to see you. I am so tired.
Her name is Star... I asked her what was going on? She did not hesitate in her admittance to using drugs. She told me that the doctors recently quoted her six months or less to live as a result of living the past several years with AIDS. Star's condition was no secret. She had been open about her diagnosis for many years. I asked her what was different today and reminded her that she has always known of her possible death. She said I guess knowing that she has reached the end of her time is the difference.
My word's to Star were that "My sister, you are putting too much faith in your disease despite that God has kept you living and looking well all these years. I told her that the doctor can only assume her life's completion. "God be the giver and taker of life." I held her hand tight as I gave her my words. As we continued talking, I explained to her that despite her circumstances she is indeed, special to God. "He Loves you Star.."
Then, I asked her a very important question. 'If God has kept you twenty four years living and looking well with your disease, why would you volunteer to assist the enemy in killing herself?"
I told her that if this is her mission then I could not contribute to such a thing. I explained that God has been good to me so that I will not have a hand in helping her to throw God's GIFT of life back into his face... I could not give her any money to buy drugs.
I do not know if my words meant anything. I do not know if my refusal to give her money angered her. What I do know is that; to be granted the gift of recovery from active addiction, and to be given twenty-four years of flawless beauty despite having such a horrible disease like AIDS is a Gift from God. This alone is enough for any "busy body" to reconsider there thoughts of returning to the slavery of addiction...
When Star realized how adamant I was, she did what any addict who is determined to use does. She kept it moving. I made my way to my car and I sat for a while praising and thanking God for his mercy & grace upon my own life. Thanking him that, I Fawn choose to appreciate his gift of life and choose to be a bellower of his word.. I also prayed for Star.
(C) logicalpoetist December 1, 2009